A parental pitfall that no one warns us of is what to do when our child’s romantic relationship with someone… ends.
Like most areas of parenting, there’s no handbook for it.
As Mom to two young men, I’ve witnessed them fall in and out of love. They’ve had their hearts broken and they’ve broken a few hearts, too. We’ve been there to comfort them, to offer advice, and, to redirect when necessary. But here’s what no one prepares us for: what to do about our relationship with her? She’s the girl he wanted us to like, the one he asked us to include in our plans, the one he planned his free time around. What do you say to her? How do you tell her that you’re sorry things didn’t work out the way they’d both imagined and that you know how much it hurts.. but that you see his discomfort, too?
Answer: You don’t. You keep your thoughts to yourself and trust that when she thinks back on times with us… she remembers cozy days, laughter, and comfortable conversations. You hope she recalls that she was welcomed and that we were kind. We hope that she knows we’ll miss her, too.
How do you mend a broken heart? Sometimes…you have to just stay the distance while your heart adjusts as well.