A relationship worth cultivating

Eaton’s girls photo from

“The most exciting, challenging, and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself.  And if you find someone to love the ‘you’ you love, well, that’s just fabulous.” ~ Carrie Bradshaw, Sex and the City

Ok, I know that a screenwriter penned those words for the character known as Miss Carrie Bradshaw but I still think they’re profound.

As a young girl, my mother did her best to stress the importance of accepting myself exactly as I was. She spoke lovingly of her late mother, my Nana, and Nana’s beautiful sisters, who were so polished and poised that they were often referred to as “Eaton’s girls.”  (Eaton’s was a national fashion department store in Canada, and Eaton’s girls were the prettiest of the pretty).   Mom made it clear to my sisters and I that we stood on the shoulders of industrious and intelligent women; women who were feminine, clever, practical and lovely. Just like me. Imagine the impact of such words on a developing and awkward young girl?

I revisit her words of advice when needed and today, I’m passing them on to you:

“You are the only person that YOU will always have … everyone else is temporary. Take the time to learn who you are and enjoy being with that person because there will come times in your life that you won’t have anyone else to turn to. If you know who you are, you will always have someone you can depend on – you – smart, wonderful, you.

She’s right, you know.

Parents. Classmates. Friends. Siblings. Co-workers. Neighbors.  There are no guarantees how long we have any of them.

Some we have relationships with for many years, others we lose track of along the way.  It’s hard to believe that girlfriends whom I was so close to 20 years ago I rarely talk with now.  Nothing drastic happened; time just moved on. Circumstances change. Kids grow up. Our jobs take us to new places and new adventures. Parents get sick and need our attention. And along the way we can lose people in the day-to-day busyness that is …. life.

So at 47 I am getting to know and accept the woman who was assured she would be nothing but creative and brave:  industrious, intelligent .. me.

    Who inspired you to be all that was dreamed for you?

Categories: Beauty, Fashion, Friendship, Home, Life Lessons, Mom, Quotes, Relationships, Self Discovery, Thoughts, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 17 Comments

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17 thoughts on “A relationship worth cultivating

  1. Wrightless

    That was a beautifully written post and very encouraging. Cheers.

  2. Thank you for such a great post. It truly is something to think about.

  3. Oh MJ, I love your mother’s words. Thank you so much for sharing this link with me.

    “If you know who you are, you will always have someone you can depend on – you – smart, wonderful, you.”

    Words to live by, for sure. I’m inspired 🙂

    • You’re welcome. She’s always been the smartest woman I’ve ever known; I’m blessed to have her to guide and inspire me – and others! Cheers, MJ

  4. Wow so true and so wise.

    Finding who we are and should be can be hard if we lose ourselves. But I can assure you it’s worth the hunt – never mind how hard the journey is!

    • Thank you, Caroline. After reading some of your journey, I immediately thought to share that. I wish you all the best and yes I will be back to check out your site again soon!!

      All the best, MJ

  5. Great post, and I love, love, love your mother’s advice. She is one smart lady! Sometimes loving yourself is the hardest relationship of all… The journey this life takes us through is a tough one that leaves many battle scars with us along the way. This is such an important thing to remember.. that no matter what… all we have is ourselves. I love it!

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