Hello world there’s a song that I’m singing .. c’mon get HAPPY!!!
I know what you’re thinking and no, I’m not on anything.
I’m just happy to be here. Seriously.
It’s a choice .. a choice I try to make every day: to embrace my life and all who are in it.
Before you think oh-my-God-she’s-one-of-those-perky-annoying-Polyanna-types-that-needs-a-big-fat-can-of-“Shut-the-hell-up!” let me assure you that I am not. I can be just as much of a naysayer as anyone. I just try not to be. And most of the time, I succeed at it.
This shift occurred 25 years ago; I was 22 years old and 8 months pregnant with my first baby.. off to the OB Doc for a check-up (by myself, but I digress) when I was hit from the side by another driver. Totaled the car and nearly totaled me: fractured my spine and left me with partial paralysis down one side. Pregnant = no drugs for the pain. Not the most fun I’ve ever had. Fast forward, baby’s born and he’s fantastic – beautiful and perfect- but I’m ..not. Weeks in hospital before Doctors decide, in a hushed voice, that we need to do something. Baby boy (who has since grown up to be a gorgeous 9′ tall man .. well, at least to me anyways, was 5 weeks old at the time. 5 weeks. That’s roughly how long ago Thanksgiving was!). Scheduled for surgery, off I go to the surgical suite. First step? Anaesthetic. Guess what? Allergic! Yep, you guessed it, respiration s-t-o-p-p-e-d while I was still awake. Stephen King novels don’t even scare me now. The last image I had was that of a black mask coming down over my face. I wake to find myself in hospital with a husband and an infant.
- Health crisis and no driving allowed (bad)
- Time with my baby boy (good)
- Steady dose of chronically unemployed narcissistic husband (bad)
- Time with my growing boy (good)
- Physical therapy, adult education and job training? (humiliating.. but ..eventually.. good)
- Time with my boy (good)
- Eviction (bad)
- Friendship (good)
- Driving again (good)
- New job for me (good)
- The boy’s thriving and smarter every day (good)
- Poverty. loneliness (hard)
- Kindness (good).
- Libraries and parks (free and good)
- Eviction (bad)
- He leaves us (good)
- I scrape enough $ for an apartment (good)
- Life is hand to mouth, no child support, 2,000+ miles from family (bad)
- Chronic paid (bad)
- Divorce (bad)
- Child custody fight (bad)
- Job opportunities (good)
- Groceries (good)
- Tight budgets and garage sale clothes (good)
- Free playdates: parks, beaches, bike rides (good)
- Court says boy has to visit scary father (bad)
- Boy comes home (good)
- Boy stays home (good)
- Boy thrives (good)
- Hard work pays = more job opportunities (good)
- Meet a kind man (good)
- Hard to trust (bad)
- He loves kids (good)
- Kid loves him (good)
- Love wins (good)
- Wedding bells (good)
- Boy gets the Dad he longed for (good)
- Custody scrap (bad.. but someone in my corner..good)
- Case thrown out (good)
- Move away from scary man (good)
- Adoption (good)
- Little brother arrives (good)
- Boys thrive. I thrive. Love wins (good)
* for more on the love story that unfolded in points 31-43, please see my post called https://emjayandthem.wordpress.com/2010/11/12/it-had-to-be-you/ (It had to be you).
Out of my 43 life points summary referenced above, only 11 are bad. So when I add it up, the good outweighs the bad.
And that, my friends, is why I choose to sing “C’mon get Happy!”