I went out with some girlfriends for lunch today. It felt wonderful to get out of the house; the sun was shining and birds were chirping.
As much as I enjoyed being out, at times, the conversation was painful because one is newly divorced after many years of marriage. She’s out there – in the big, bad dating world. I don’t envy her. This is someone who went from her parents home to her husband’s and who has never been on her own. Never. There’s no rulebook for this.
Coming home, I couldn’t help but think of this old clip about blind dates, and be thankful that I’m not traversing those waters. After all our reassurances that this is the “new normal,” I hope she sees this and I hope she laughs. There’s not been enough laughter of late.
People say life’s too short.
The reality is life is too damn long if you’re miserable.
I’m glad she’s happier now… and finding her new “normal.” It’s not easy.. but it is possible.
And sometimes, it’s funny, too.
Aw. I’ve had several friends go through this and while it is certainly harder for the friend, it is hard for you too. It’s hard to know what to say and to relate to the issues they are facing. At least it was hard for me (married 17 years). I too am so glad not to be in the dating pool of 40-somethings these days. Some of my friend’s dating stories are ridiculous and some are scary. Ugh. But you are right, it’s better than being in a miserable marriage. Glad you got out and about!
I agree, Caroline. It was difficult to see the pain now but, honestly, it was hard on all of us when they were together b/c they were so unhappy …. and that’s not good for anyone. It’s difficult to know what to say so as to not sound trite and predictable. Hard situation! Thanks for commenting :). MJ
The dating game is hard but you can’t replicate those feelings, when you meet someone new, of excitement, anticipation and joy in any other situation.
Well .. there is that. And those moments can soften the edges of the loneliness, too. Thanks, Nicole, for commenting! MJ
Hmmm, scary! I have a similar story, married in college, went from parents to dorm to marriage…don’t want to be out there! Good luck to your friend.
Sheila
Thank you, Sheila. 🙂 MJ
Hilarious video. Thanks for being there for your friend with laughter and good humor. I love what you said about life being too long if you’re miserable…powerful and just more to be said about living the best life possible for you.
Indeed; I remember when I got divorced and was a single mom with no child support living miles from family…. daunting at best. But … having my own space, as hard and $$ as it was, was far better than one minute in that other world. I am hopeful she finds her way… and learns who she is in all of this. That’s what it’s all about I think. Thanks for weighing in! 🙂 MJ
poor her, great vid!!
Agreed; sometimes .. laughter isn’t too far from tears and it can surely soothe the hurts. Thanks for visiting :), MJ.