The first brick

I remember the first time that I knew, really knew, that Hubbs was the one for me.

It wasn’t the way he showed up early for our dates or the thoughtful way he listened when I had something to say.

It wasn’t the flowers that he’d sent, although he’d sent them often.

It wasn’t the tender way he played with my (then 5-year-old) boy, although that surely melted my wounded heart (and still does, just thinking about it.)

It wasn’t even the way he kissed me good night or how he always added an anguished growl as he left us.

No, it was all of those things and more: It was doing what he’d said he’d do.  Calling when he said he would. Showing up when he promised to be there.  He taught me, in his own quiet way, that before me was a real man, an honorable and dependable man,  a man with a deep voice, broad shoulders and a tender heart.  A man a girl could set her clocks to .. forever.

“Here’s something else to think about: calling when you say you’re going to is the very first brick in the house you are building of love and trust. If he can’t lay this one stupid brick down, you ain’t never gonna have a house baby, and it’s cold outside.”
— Greg Behrendt, “He’s just not that into you.”

*and I can’t write of bricks without adding in this classic Commodores hit!

How about you? When did you know that someone had built a foundation for you?

Categories: Attitude, Faith, Growth, Quotes, Thoughts, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 27 Comments

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27 thoughts on “The first brick

  1. .I was “smitten” by my future wife as far back as 6th grade..she is the real deal…kind, no airs about her, and cute. I was drawn to her personality first and foremost….I say that because I’ve known good looking women who had the personality of a pig..didn’t do a thing for me. went on one date when I was 16, but didn’t really start building a relationship until after high school. She exudes (hope that is the word I’m thinking of) 😉 a nurturing quality that even after 32 yrs of marriage. I am a rich man. Glad you found a keeper too 🙂

    • Oh I how I loved that you shared your story with me/us. Beautiful! I am so tickled to know that, 32 years later, you’re still “ga-ga” over her. Bests to you, DM.

  2. I knew that Connie was the girl for me when she didn’t play any of the “games” that my previous loves had; asked me about stuff that I was interested in and genuinely loved me for who I really was (warts and all…that’s just an expression…I have no warts).

  3. Life is grand when one has the right person to share it with.

    • Indeed it is. I’ve experienced both ends of the spectrum and was never so lonely as when I had the wrong person right next to me; Hubbs showed up, he listened and best yet? He stayed.

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  5. Well said, MJ. The foundation determines whether you can weather the storms. I’d say you are both lucky to have found each other.

    • I have to agree and, in fact, I tell him that all the time: “You’re darn lucky to have me y’know.” Then we both tip our heads back like muppets and laugh our faces off – ha!

      😉 MJ

  6. cooper

    10th grade. french class (no comments). She walked in. it was over.

  7. cooper

    oh…and yesterday was our 33rd anniversary….

  8. When we first met in my parents’ home, he stayed and played cards with my brother until 3:00 in the morning. I had turned in much earlier. My brother reported the next day how late they had stayed up. Then, I thought, if he got along that well with my brother who I adore, he might just find a place in my heart.

    • … mmm hmmm. Anyone who will stick around and get to know the family definitely wants to know the gal! Love this story, Georgette 🙂 MJ

  9. Still waiting for my brick layer 🙂

    • Understand, Sandi! Sometimes we see the brick layer in our own personality (what we do for others) & then sometimes we meet someone who is willing to lay a few bricks down for us. Wishing you a big, handsome one.. stateside 🙂 MJ

      • Thanks, MJ 🙂 I’m more comfortable with myself and I think that will be evident to others after I get home!

  10. On the dance floor at my niece’s wedding when I blurted out the L word and knew I had finally broken down the brick wall that I had built to keep everyone out. He had been kindly building a beautiful foundation but it was at that moment I could see it. Fun post MJ 🙂

    • Ooh … tingles! I love this story … isn’t that the way it goes? We build up the brick wall and they work steadily at it but in reality, it’s us who has the power to knock it down once we see someone worthwhile on the other side. Beautiful, Bella!

  11. Funny … for me, I knew Rob was the one on Tuesday September 11, 2001. He was in Houston, and I was in Atlanta. He was to return home that night, and we were to fly to San Francisco for week. Suffice it to say, he did not fly home, and we did not fly to San Francisco. Instead, he rushed to get one of the few remaining rental cars, and I loaded up my car. We met in New Orleans, and I brought him home the rest of the way. When those towers fell, I knew I did not want to be without Rob. He had yet to propose, but I knew he would. Oddly enough, MJ – tomorrow is Tuesday September 11, 2012. Rob is in Houston this week. I’m a little more anxious than normal with him being gone…. at this particular time. We have our foundation. I don’t want anything to wash it away.

    • Wow, Lenore, I do believe you have yourself a blog post right there; I think there were quite a few people who realized certainties that day – how they wanted to live, and who they wanted to live with. I am so glad you have each other and that something wonderful came from that awful day.

      As an aside, those bright blue September skies on 9/11? We’ve had them here for about 4 days and, as much as I adore them, I can’t help but feel a bit spooked by them. Reminders are all around.


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