…but I may be crazy *(Billy Joel).
Just yesterday, I had a good friend ask my opinion.
Before she asked, she prefaced her question with this, “I know what you’re going to say, but I’m asking your opinion anyways.”
She has a situation with her husband, who’s been working for several years towards a higher degree; he’s about to graduate and receive major accolades for all that hard work. His parents have said they want to attend the ceremony and subsequent celebrations. Here’s the rub: they’re not involved, with her, their kids, his life, … anything. But. They’re his parents. I understand why she feels as she does. She has every reason to resent them because she’s been the one who sacrificed so he could accomplish all that he did. Not them. But. They’re his parents. I understand her position, and believe me when I say there’s been enough water under this bridge to cause a flood. But he wants them there. And. They’re his parents.
Her question to me: Should I tell him I’m afraid they’ll make it all about them? That they’ll steal his thunder, and all his hard work. And the unspoken part: that them being there renders her invisible… again.
My response: “Are you telling him something he doesn’t already know?”
Her answer, “No.”
My next question: “Do you think that their being there lessens all you’ve done for him?”
Her answer, “No.”
My second to last question: “How does this help?”
Her answer, “I dunno.”
My last question, “Is there a possibility you have a need to say ‘I told you so’ ..later on?”
Her response, “Maybe.”
My words, “Suit yourself.”
T – Is it true? H – Is it helpful? I – Is it inspiring? N – Is it necessary? K – Is it kind?
There were times in my life that I had a huge need to be right, to get the last word in. I’m don’t do that much anymore .. it’s just too much darn work. And … the Jimmy-Cracked-Corn file is nearly full.
You may be right
I may be crazy
But it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for
Turn out the light
Don’t try to save me
You may be wrong for all I know
But you may be right – Billy Joel