It’s been a month since I wrote last.
1 month.
1 month, 2 weddings & a funeral.
Sounds like a movie title.
Time marches on, life slowly returns to some semblance of normal.
The phone rings. Emails chime in. Cell phone buzzes.
It’s good to be back; a routine is helpful to me.
But … other times fatigue hits like a wet blanket.
There’s no logic to it.
Grief.
You’re sideswiped when you least expect it.
Looking at a picture, singing a song, holding something she’d held.
Then I think about the past 6 months and the growth that’s occurred ~ 6 months ago {today} I was nervously off to meet with some rather tough hombres. Tonight is meeting #4 with same crew. No nerves. Funny how that goes, isn’t it? She’d smile at that and give me a thumbs up. I’ll take it, too.
Yes there were many stories to share, many moments. Many laughs, many tears. Many kind words, much emotion expressed. So much.
Like the passage I read at her funeral .. .there’s a time for all things under Heaven.
And as she’d want us to, we laughed. We cried. We sang. We danced. We remembered. And, as she’d nudge us to, we carried on.
Thank you for your kind words on the passage of my Mother.
Your kindness gave me the strength to square my shoulders, smile broadly and speak openly about her at the memorial. She was with me and so were you.
PS ~ our last conversation was personal and political, we bantered about Rump and Billary ~ I can’t tell you how much I love that 🙂
I know this has been such an emotional time for you: happiness and grief intermingled. That’s sweet of you to say that we were all there with you…and it’s true. Welcome back!
thank you Dianna, it’s good to be back! MJ
Good to see you back. The grief lasts forever but you learn to manage it. Still miss my Mom who died in ’86. Once in a while I still go for the phone to tell her something. Then I smile. She already knows.
I get that. I never learned the # where she was most recently, I had to look it up every time. In my mind she’s still at the farm and I can call the old farm house # that we’ve had forever .. now disconnected. 😦 MJ
I remember my Mom’s phone number too.
always ❤
Welcome back MJ. What a time you have had. But, you are right. So many of us have been with you and mourning for your loss. We would if we could put all our thumbs up(s) in our comments to cheer you on for getting through the tough times and “hanging in there.”
I could feel you with me, I swear! 🙂 MJ
Only a funeral and two marriages? What about selling your old home, buying a new one, remodeling it and then moving after clearing out several years of “stuff”. You’ve had THREE summers in one. Take some time for yourself.
R
Oh that – that was the previous month – or 2! crazy summer — it will be Halloween before I can blink!! MJ
Well…okay then. Maybe an adult beverage and some tunes. 🙂
R
AB and tunes are always a good combo!! MJ
Love hearing about your last conversation with your mom! Always enjoy your musings. DM
I loved it, too ~ she was smart and sharp right till the end. That is so comforting. If she had slipped mentally that would have been devastating to her. Thanks DM, MJ
Good to see you, MJ. Yes, those moments will come and slow you down for a bit, but they’ll ease as time passes. I don’t know how people speak, or sing, at a loved one’s funeral. Certainly, there is grace. I was also thinking of the move this year. Hope things settle down for you, maybe just a little!
I didn’t know if I could do it but I knew I wanted to. I knew that a woman as remarkable as she was couldn’t be summed up by a formal date to date and bible quote. There was so much more to her than that ~ I spoke about her personality, her tenaciousness (living with a lifelong difficult medical condition and never complaining), her adventurousness, sense of humor, what she taught us and her faith. She knew where she was going and that let me not be afraid to speak of her ~ I know I’ll see her again 🙂 Her faith and total confidence in me gave me the strength to stand tall (I’m not tall at all), speak clearly, smile often and celebrate the gift of a mother who wanted to be one!! MJ
That’s wonderful, MJ.
Glad you are back and life I am sure, is slowly getting back to normal. If there is such a thing. You have been through a lot so you deserve some rest. Take care.
Thank you Shirley, I will. MJ
It sounds so cliche, but life does go on, doesn’t it? I hope that each day brings more smiles than tears. She would want that for you.
It surely does. MJ