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Posts Tagged With: The Handmaid’s Tale

Lists in the face

I remember being surprised at being invited to that executive’s retirement party given we’d hardly interacted.  I was around 27 and, looking back, a bit naive.

The night of the party, one of the (ancient) executive’s pals, in his toast to the retiree, joked about inviting “pretty girls like __(me)__ so we all have something nice to look at.” Their wives looked horrified and sad, most men chuckled, and I can still feel the rage at being reduced to “something.”

I know and have loved many wonderful men – decent, kind and gentle men.  I’m fortunate I can easily rattle off a long list including Grandfathers,  Great Uncles, Dad and his brothers, my husband and our sons. But I also have known – and had to work with – creeps.  And, in my experience, the creeps spoil the well for the good men.

Now, as a Grandmother, my Spidey senses are on FIRE whenever I’m out with our grandkids – both grandSON and grandDAUGHTER — I watch them like a hawk even though they aren’t “babies” any more.    I’m hyper-aware of everyone around us; if one asks to go off to another aisle to “see just one thing” we all go; it’s not up for discussion.

I’ve talked with the grands about good people and bad people, about trusting their instincts, and if someone makes them feel uncomfortable or unsafe to tell any of us, and that they will never be in trouble for doing so.  I worry about Social Media and creepy perverts who lurk in shadows everywhere.  But, as many of us know, creepy perverts were in our churches, schools, and communities long before Facebook or SnapChat ever existed.

I made a quick list of how experiences with creepy men has impacted how I live; the list wrote itself in minutes.

  • I stay alert and pay attention to surroundings; if someone feels “off” I get away from them.
  • I never walk, shop for groceries or stop for gas in the dark.
  • I prefer to exercise in the house vs. in the neighborhood.
  • I wear a cross body purse, always and my cell phone remains charged and accessible, even at home.
  • I check the back seat of any vehicle before getting in, anywhere and in every light.
  • I rarely venture away from the hotel when traveling for business ~ Company (male) colleagues like to walk to restaurants for group events (because they never have to think about lists like this!). I prefer to take a taxi but will walk in a larger (mixed) group.
  • I never sleep on flights.
  • All windows and doors are locked  ~ if I find myself alone at the office (very off-putting) I take the cell phone with me to the copier or the restroom.
  • On business trips /outings I stick to water or (sometimes) order a cocktail I don’t like and sip it; whatever I have goes with me to the ladies’ room.
  • It’s Hubby’s deep voice on the answering machine.
  • I’m not thin anymore;  extra weight has lessened the burden of unwanted attention.
  • I never use parking garages,  valet where possible and expense it, and offer no explanations or apologies.
  • I don’t get on elevators with men, not even one.
  • I limit fluids during road trips which limits stops, and never use highway rest areas; Fast food restaurants only.
  • At company functions I employ the Irish Good-bye – excuse myself and don’t come back.

Your turn:

  • Can you relate to this post?
  • How have your experiences impacted the way you navigate your day-to-day life?
    • Any tips or thoughts to add?

 

“Men often ask me, Why are your female characters so paranoid? It’s not paranoia. It’s recognition of their situation.” — Margaret Atwood, author of “The Handmaid’s Tale”

 

 

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Categories: Attitude, Determination, Faith, fear, Grief, Growth, Life, Life Lessons, News, Opinion, Personal, Self Discovery, Thoughts, Travel, Useful Information, Work | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Five for Friday and Fall

It’s Friday ~ Whoop!!  A crazy week filled with travel, airports, meetings, people and … whew … not much personal time or space.  Home again and looking at a busy weekend filled with fun outings ~ Yay!

Here’s my Friday Five:

1  Fall has arrived.  My. Favorite. Season.  The mornings are cool & the days are warm.  We have a saying around here:  winter on top, summer on the bottom.  Meaning you can wear shorts & a hoodie most of the time and be perfectly comfy. But you’d better have a tee-shirt under that hoodie for the hot afternoons. And keep it close for when the sun departs.  Fall!!  Colors.  Temps.  Clear Skies.  Apples. Pumpkins. All of it – I. Love. Fall!

Frankie loved Fall

Frankie loved Fall, too (an Emjayandthem (c) photo) ❤

2  I had to take another personality test for an upcoming (work) conference.  I swear they’re trying to decide if you’re a serf or a serial killer.  Underling or a Gladiator.  The questions are so extreme and some are just stupid.  Your choice of answers include: highly disagree, disagree, neutral, agree or highly agree. Here’s a sample question:  I strive to be accurate.   My answer: highly agree.  Isn’t being accurate the point?  You’re either accurate … or you’re not.  Being close, in most situations, doesn’t count. You can’t sort of explain policy.  You can’t kind of return a phone call.  You can’t sometimes make sure formulas work.  You either do … or you missed the mark entirely.  Geez Louise.   Yeah, they’ll probably deduce I’m a highly accurate Gladiator!

russell-crowe-in-gladiator-movie

Is. That. Wrong?

3   At our meetings this week we were asked to introduce ourselves, talk a little about our background and offer up a favorite song, movie and book ~ judging ensued and prizes were awarded.  It was a fun way to get to know the new people in the organization and I was proud that my book choice made it to the final round.  If you’ve never read it, I highly recommend “The Handmaid’s Tale” by Canadian Author Margaret Atwood.  Chilling.

google.images.com

google.images.com

4  I had a layover in Chicago O’Hare where I enjoyed people watching, airport shopping and … buying new books. 🙂    It’s funny to me how the items for sale in an airport fall into 4 categories 1) luggage related, 2) I’m bored and ooh that’s so very sparkly, 3) books and 4) food.  That’s pretty much it.   I passed up the bedazzled briefcase on wheels, the designer cologne and scooped up 2 bestsellers.  Yes!

image from theexaminer.com

image from theexaminer.com

5  I always say this but as much as I love to go~ I love to come home even more. My flight was due to land at 10:30 and I still had to grab my car etc so I texted Hubbs to let him know it’d be 11:30 before I got home and not to wait up.  Sweetest response ever, “I’ll wait up. Be safe”   It’s the little things ❤

 

Happy Friday! Are you also excited for Fall’s arrival?   Do personality tests freak you out?  What’s the most interesting thing you’ve bought in an airport?   If you had to list them – what choices would make it to your top song, book and movie? 

 

Categories: Attitude, Family, Fun, Home, Life, Men, Opinion, Personal, Seasons, Thoughts | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

My arms hurt

From an afternoon spent in the bookstore and what an excellent adventure it was! One afternoon last week I took some used books to a local book store; setting my books on the counter, I wandered off while the book lady perused my items.  I forgot to pick up a basket and instead carried a stack with me, hence the sore arms.  They elected to buy some books and pass on others and, in the end, I earned myself a sweet $28 store credit (sellers get 20% of the book’s value in cash or 30% in a store credit).

Well.

You know what comes next, right?

More books for me!  All totaled, I think I was in the store for 2 hours, but I really don’t know because I lost track of time.   Bookstores do that to me, but I digress.

I wandered. I read. I perused. I laughed and I relaxed.   But … the very best part was finding one older book that I’ve always wanted to read. I’d seen the movie years ago and it has disturbed and intrigued me ever since.

What is it?  “The Handmaid’s Tale” by Margaret Atwood.

In the world of the near future, who will control women’s bodies?

In the Republic of Gilead, formerly the United States, far-right ideals have been carried to extremes in the mono-theocratic government. The resulting society is a feminist’s nightmare: women are strictly controlled, unable to have jobs or money (or read) and are assigned to various classes: the chaste, childless Wives; the housekeeping Marthas; and the reproductive Handmaids, who turn their offspring over to the “morally fit” Wives. The tale is told by Offred (read: “of Fred”), a Handmaid who recalls the past and tells how the chilling society came to be. This powerful, memorable novel is highly recommended for most libraries.  Source: Library Journal.

google.images.com

So, today, I can choose to watch the news and listen to politicians rant about contraceptive coverage, health insurance mandates, religious freedom, economic liberty, social issues and birth control.  Or I can pick up this book and read all about it.

One’s fiction, the other isn’t.  Which one’s scarier?

Now that I think about it, my head hurts, too.

Categories: Elections, Life, News, Opinion, Politics, Thoughts, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

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