Posts Tagged With: women

The story continues

Nearly a year ago, a good friend passed away.  But her story doesn’t end there.

You see, through her friendship and the support group we formed at her diagnosis, new friends have come into my life.  And stayed.

Now I’m so glad I had made room in my friendship cupboard  – long before she passed I had Lysol-ed the energy vampires away and made room for some battery chargers.  But I hadn’t yet filled it.  Something told me to wait.

And, because of her, I met them – fabulous, smart, accomplished women with friendship and love to share. No snarping. No jealousies. Just people who love you and lift you up. People just like her.

We could have all just met last summer and had our laughs through the fall and cried together at her funeral and went our separate ways, and yes, there were some who did.  But there are more who felt the void and looked around at other marvelous people left standing and thought – as I did – “I wonder.” And it’s in the re-connecting now, the laughter now, the telling of her stories now, that she lives on.  In us.  And that brown-eyed girl, man, she would have loved this.

Have you ever made a new friend in an unorthodox way?  What has another’s death taught you about living?

Categories: Attitude, Beauty, Faith, Family, Grief, Growth, Joy, music, Personal, Relationships, Thoughts, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

Playing with fire

“Man may have discovered fire, but women discovered how to play with it.”  Candace Bushnell, “Sex and the City”

Sophia Loren and Jayne Mansfield;

Do you think women dress for the men in their lives … or the women?

When it’s date night, I enjoy dressing the way hubbs appreciates ….  all boom-chica-mow-mow and then some.  And he does the same for me.   (Without the boom-chica-stuff… makes most guys feel ridiculous).

But, I never dress that way unless he’s with me. No, when I’m with friends, colleagues or even family, I am non-threatening in my attire.  I dress to fit in; conservatively, tastefully, and buttoned-uppedy.

So, with that being said, can I just say that I love being a girl?

Can I just say that I love having curves that I keep contained for the Hubbs?

Can I just say that, for all the pony-riding, tomboyish days of my youth, that I love getting my nails done and fixing my hair and feeling pretty and foxy and all sassy-frassy?

Can I just say that I absolutely, without hesitation, embrace my feminine strengths, the ones who let me rock a pencil skirt and heels and a power drill all in the same day?

Oh, I think I can say it:  I do believe I just did.

image from

How about you?  Does your wardrobe change for the various roles in your life?

What makes you feel fine?

* * *

*This post was inspired by my closet and the various characters living within.

Categories: Attitude, Beauty, Men, Opinion, Thoughts, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 36 Comments


Categories: Attitude, Determination, Faith, Friendship, Life, Personal, Quotes, Relationships, Romance, Self Discovery, Thoughts, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Music for a morning

(Photo by Mark Mainz/Getty Images; available at

It’s Friday and it’s been a challenging week. I need something big to get me motivated this morning.

I give you Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” performed by Canadian songstress k.d. lang.

Disregard her politics, her lifestyle and yes, even her lack of shoes.

   Just close your eyes and let her voice take you someplace wonderful.

Categories: Beauty, Faith, Forgiveness, Gratitude, Life, music, Opinion, Personal, Random, Romance, Share, Thoughts, Uncategorized | Tags: , | 14 Comments

Wishes really do come true

my picture: snow geese in flight over the farm

I did it. 

Christmas is 3 days away and my “stress-free holiday” plan is working!  

Being thankful, staying optimistic, clearing out the clutter in my life and making room for what’s most important has had a profound impact on my well-being this year. 

The washing machine has been dying a slow death for months. It finally screeched to a halt last night. Freaked out? Not in the least.  Not an issue because I’m done wrapping, baking, shopping etc. and I can easily handle picking out a new one on my lunch hour today.  

Budget a problem? No, not really, and mostly because I didn’t host a huge party this year (accompanied by huge expense).   I had blogged about my wish list here and I just realized last night everything I was hoping for is coming to fruition.

* * * *

My wish is that anyone reading this will see the promise of what is Christmas. 

When possible, forgive.  

When not, give yourself permission to step away.  

When you can help, do so.

Choose words carefully. 

Refrain from criticism. 

Pick up the phone and call an elderly relative.   

Do something nice for someone else just because you can.

Mix it up.  

Stop the schedule.   Slow down.

Look around.




Categories: Attitude, Faith, Gratitude, Home, Life, Opinion, Personal, Quotes, Random, Seasons, Wisdom | Tags: , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Kapow Kapow, baby

As much of a tomboy as I was growing up, I just love me some kitten eyes now.

Nothing says Kapow Kapow, Baby more than smoky, smoldering, meow-mix kitten eyes.  Think Sophia Loren – Eva Mendes – Joan Collins – Brigitte Bardot – smoky and spicy hot!

Not appropriate for day time.  Barely appropriate for night (me-yowza!)

The gorgeous and exotic Sophia Loren. Photo: flickr

My source to get such effects? From makeup artist Alexis Vogel

A special benefit?  Order the complete kit since it comes with a “how – to” DVD.  Yep. Perfect for dorks like me whose high school beauty kit consisted of Bonne Bell lip smackers and match-my-mood blush.   I’m guilty of 80s fashion crimes including black eyeliner and blue shadow .. oh yeah .. worked it, worked it.  But, as I matured, I poured over Cosmopolitan and tried my best to look like that… but, I didn’t have the tools or the know-how.  Then .. along comes Alexis Vogel who delivers a kit of well made products and the expertise  —  a super secret pass-key into a world of girl-dom that I knew existed but couldn’t attain.

Why makeup?

Because I like it.

Because I’m creative.

Because I like to put it all together and see what happens.

I’m not a Birkenstock kinda girl.   I’m just ..not.

On date nights with the hubbs, I’m all about hair that’s full, lips that are red and …cleavage. I like clothes that are fitted and eyes that sparkle. (And so does he ..)

Come to think of it, the holidays are approaching which means time off and lots of date nights — I do believe it’s time to re-order.  Whee !!

Categories: Attitude, Confidence at any age, Fashion, Humor, Life, Men, Opinion, Personal, Products I love, Self Discovery, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Don’t be a Travel Turkey


 Flying today? 

Below are my tried & true travel tips for simpler, stress-free travel:

  • Pack a snack – fruit, peanut butter crackers, trail mix, etc. Anything that takes the edge off if you’re delayed .. and starving
  • Wear comfy clothes that you’re ok sitting or standing in. Ditto on the shoes.  

  • Ladies – Skip the purse and instead take a small backpack (you can fit your reading materials, snack, mp3 player and jacket in it)

  • Get to the airport early!

  • Bring or buy magazines & leave them for other travelers when you’re finished (and you don’t have to carry them both ways)

  • Most importantly – pack your sense of humor. Smile  – be patient – help others if you can.  


Happy Travels!



Categories: Attitude, Family, Food, Forgiveness, Gratitude, Holidays, Humor, Life, Life Lessons, News, Opinion, Personal, Rants, Relationships, Travel, Useful Information, Wisdom | Tags: , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Live with Intention


Live with intention.

Walk to the edge.

Listen. Hard.

Practice wellness.

Play with abandon.


Choose with no regret.

Continue to learn.

Appreciate your friends.

Do what you love.

Live. As. If. This. Is. All. There. Is.

-mary anne radmacher

Categories: Attitude, Confidence at any age, Family, Forgiveness, Friendship, Gratitude, Humor, Life, Life Lessons, Personal, Quotes, Random observations, Relationships, Wisdom, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments


We have an owl living in the woods behind our house; sometimes, he hangs out on our rooftop, as it provides an excellent lookout point to what scurries beneath the street light.  Not only are they beautiful animals, but I find their “whoo whoo” sounds to be very comforting.

Some time ago, I had a session with a local reader who is Native American. Much of her wisdom comes to her in the form of “totems” or symbols of character traits.

She told me my Totem was the Owl.  I found this summary particularly interesting:

Totem of the Owl: messenger, deception, clairvoyance, insight (the night eagle)  Owls come in all sizes, from a tiny miniature that actually lives inside the cactus in the desert, to the great horned owl, which is the only bird that can out fly the golden eagle. A fully grown great horned is an awe-inspiring creature. Its talons are furry, and closely resemble the paws of a baby mountain lion with claws extended. It is meat eater, which means it can be a fierce warrior if challenged, or if something dear to it is threatened. It is often referred to as the Night Eagle. The owl is at home in the night. It has great awareness of all that is around it at all times. It has predator vision, which means it sees clearly what it looks at. It has great intuition: it is the totem of psychics and clairvoyants. It has the courage to follow its instincts. Owl’s ability includes seeing behind masks, silent and swift movement, keen sight, messenger of secrets and omens, shape-shifting, link between the dark, unseen world and the world of light, comfort with shadow self, moon power, freedom.

Owl people can see into the darkness of others souls. Most owl people are clairvoyant because of this. This can be scary at times. Learn to trust your instincts about people as an owl totem gives you the power to extract secrets. Listen to its voice inside of you. You will hear not what is being said by others, but what is hidden.   You can detect subtleties of voice that others cannot. People cannot deceive a person who has an owl totem.

Funny, one of the things I’ve preached to our boys over the years is to “Listen to your instincts; go with your gut. If something rubs you the wrong way, run. Pay attention and never ignore it.” I’ve told this because the only times I’ve gotten in trouble was when I ignored that voice.

Categories: Life Lessons, Opinion, Personal, Quotes, Random observations, Relationships, Seasons, Traditions, Useful Information, Wisdom, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Peace ..

It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.

Categories: Attitude, Confidence at any age, Gratitude, Holidays, Life, Life Lessons, Opinion, Personal, Quotes, Random observations, Seasons, Uncategorized, Wisdom, Women | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

It had to be you

me & the hubbs.  An Emjayandthem (C) photo

Happened across this song the other day and it took me back.  Back to living in Connecticut  where I met the Hubbs.  I was a divorced single parent of a 5-year-old boy; he was a well-traveled businessman from the midwest. I had a child. I did not date. I worked and took care of my son.  But a relentless girlfriend dragged me out on a Friday night and that’s where we met. He chatted with her (I thought he liked my friend) but, little did I know, he was working his way to me.  (foxy loxie that he is)

From the start, we had every obstacle in our way. Before we even had our first date, my employer announced we were relocating 6 states away.. in 4 months.  But summer was nearing and, cautiously, we started spending time together – the 3 of us – how’s that for romance?   Seeing a big shouldered man play with a teenage-mutant-ninja-turtled little boy softened my wounded heart.

One night we wrangled a sitter & decided to see the movie we were hearing a lot about, “When Harry met Sally.”  Understand, Mr. Hubbs doesn’t like movies.  Doesn’t go to movies. Didn’t know it then but he accommodated …me.

Can’t hear this song without thinking of him and that summer we fell in love .. over playdates with a 5-year-old, and day trips to New York City.

Update: we moved, he moved too, we married, had 2nd son, lived, loved and laughed together. And here we are … 19 years later.. and tonight’s “date night!” Think I’m gonna dig out our Harry Connick cds for later … And our 5-year-old boy? He’s now a grown man, married to his love who brought a 5-year-old boy to their marriage. That little boy.. you guessed it .. he loves Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, too.

Categories: Family, Gratitude, Life, Love, music, Personal, Random observations, Relationships, Seasons | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments

What I learned at Parent/Teacher conferences

It’s that time again. P/T conferences.  The hubbs and I wrapped up our work day and timed our arrival with the start of the conference window: the teachers were ready to go and we were five minutes early.  Yes!!!!   We were a little apprehensive because, in a couple of classes, we knew his grades weren’t quite where they could be. So,  we weren’t too surprised by the usual comments like  “he’s a good kid but with just a little more effort, he’d be all set.”

However, what resonates with me most were the comments about him, as an individual.   By. Every. Single. Teacher.  As is our habit, afterwards the three of us sat down over supper and talked through each class: what’s working, what needs improvement, etc.  As we know, school ends, and life/college/obligations begin.  We made sure we conveyed what they said about his character because it’s important he knows that, as a person, he’s already succeeding.

A sampling:

  • What a kind-hearted and generous young man.
  • He always has something good to say.   
  • He offers encouragement to others.
  • He is interested and interesting.
  • He has a great sense of humor and brings a lot to the class.
  • He participates but he doesn’t “hog” the floor.
  • He’s able to articulate his feelings in a way that’s relevant to the lesson.
  • He includes everyone and this class is very diverse; he helps others without being asked. 
  • I absolutely love having him in my class; we have some great debates and he tries to see all sides.  Even when we don’t agree, he is respectful. 

Yes there are some organizational efficiences to address.  We can all use our time better. But .. on the personality side? The human side? The what kind of man will you grow up to be one day side?


Nice job, kid.


Categories: Confidence at any age, Family, Gratitude, Life, Life Lessons, Love, Personal, Random observations, Relationships, Wisdom | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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